Taranjeet Kaur

Things I miss about my hometown iPad drawing

July 24, 2020

Recently I drew a picture on the iPad of things I was missing about my hometown, the week I was due to share about it in my newsletter (sign up form on the side if you haven’t already) my hometown had a terrorist incident. Yep, the same ‘nothing ever happens in Reading’ a person caused terror to people in the park in the town center, killing three innocent people and injuring others in a two minute spree.

It shook me as it was one of the first non Covid-19 news stories on TV, a place I’ve been going to on and off since my teenage years, the last time being as a family. It’s reminded me to be more aware and vigilant at outdoor spaces.

At the time, lockdown rules were easing and ‘bubbles’ of people were meeting up, though still, our monthly trip went amiss. I wrote and drew it focusing on what I missed and how I felt.

It’s become a big theme of mine (especially in this time) to feel and share it, to feel and explore it before I go off and do twenty other things.

To stop and notice how I feel and realise it’s ok to feel differently from others.

Some of the things mentioned give room for personal growth, better money management and to appreciate the cultural difference. I don’t hate them, I have grown to appreciate difference and be more adaptable.

I enjoy drawing on the iPad, on Procreate, though I’m doing one physical spread in my journal each week, you can find these in my sketchbook and on Instagram as @analogkaur.

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How I wrote an E-Book with a baby under one

June 21, 2020

In Summer 2019 I compiled all the information I had on Kundalini Yoga, years of experience and personal stories into a product, with a newborn baby by my side, you read more about it in my shop here.

The act of creating comes naturally to me, being supportive and caring does too, it’s in our instincts as a mother and as an artist/writer living a creative life.

What took me by surprise and threw everything out of balance was that although I was doing things, like baby bottles, nappy changes, and learning as a new mum, I still didn’t feel as if I was using my brain enough. My identity had shifted and my habits to that held me together as a person – morning Sadhanas, reading books at leisure, painting in my journal, writing, and movie watching – were thrown out as a non-priority.

And I was tired, so tired. Though I was determined to feel a bit more ‘myself’ while looking out for this beautiful new human being. I read How to make the beast beautiful by Sarah Wilson a very honest story on anxiety while pumping milk into a bottle, before choosing formula. I read Miracle Morning for Parents by Hal Elrod and Linsday McCarthy another great read that made me feel less alone as someone that still wanted to do non-baby-related stuff. My husband would come home to me wailing ‘I’m failing everything’, eventually I had three solid days no outburst of tears and I felt like I’d reached new ground.

At first, I couldn’t write because I was so tired and hormonal, instead, I researched the local area for things to do. I found a Yoga studio I later taught at (and still do each Wednesday).

By now baby was five months, and we were going out together, another great read is Tara Mohr’s Playing Big, she wrote the book while pregnant then finished and released it when her son was a baby. If that wasn’t inspiration I don’t know what is.

Nap time writing time

I started in very simple steps, I wrote out the title of each chapter on big streams of paper, then filled in the subjects to cover under each one. I also had the idea to include colourful posters in each chapter, more work though fun anyway, I did these posters before I had an iPad with drawing apps on. I would draw them then colour them in with felt pens or watercolours, scan them in the computer, crop and save them then insert them onto a blank page. I did this in NAP TIME, the process was not always smooth, I messed up many sheets of paper and I did it going back and forth between three rooms – somehow.

I used the desktop app Kindle create to put everything together into one file and upload it to Amazon, I did the same sort of process for iBooks too. The great thing about E-Books is they can be put together fairly easily and without an ISBN. It appealed to me to have something out there, as possible passive income that is the same price as a yoga class.

It was the drive of creating something to completion that kept me going from motherhood tasks to creative project to-dos – even now I believe that having small amounts of ‘me’ time often makes me a better mum. To others, this me-time may look like watching TV, laying on the sofa all day, though for me I needed to use the right side of my brain, to learn, to problem-solve – to feel sane and human and whole.

Making posters for the book

My biggest lesson of being a new mum and creative at the same time was that once I had the E-Book up I felt it was finished when that is where it should have got started again ie. Sharing marketing. I go over this in Part 2 of the post coming soon!

Or head over to the shop and read more about Keep Up with Kundalini Yoga, a guide for beginners E-Book.

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The number one thing I’ve realised with authentic living

June 14, 2020

It’s six months into the year 2020 and I feel more connected to my word of the year than at the start. I can see it’s an easy word to hide behind and say wildly and openly, I see it’s gifts and vulnerability too.

My word for the year is Authentic.

I spoke about it at the start of the year in this video, I put on my website header – live an authentic life now. I have been more direct in communication, through intentions, and with what I want and feel is right over agreeing with everything, an easy thing to do.

I’ve taken social media off my phone and I feel more ‘in the world’ and getting to know myself better without the images, thoughts, and opinions of others so much.

What struck me is that I realised it’s not about saying ‘I’m authentic’ or ‘I live an authentic life’ but in the doing first. I changed my entire website while doing 40 Days of Mala Simran and on the top image I put ‘rediscover your power with art and yoga’. These were aspects I wanted to show and share, I didn’t have a plan other than upload journal pages and teach yoga each Wednesday. I knew these were important to me.

It’s while she napped and I had a spontaneous two-hour play with acrylics while watching Art Club on my bedroom floor that it hit me.

How are you going to be authentic? Sure through habits, daily actions, and better communication though what makes your heart sing?

This. Art making. Yoga doing.

It’s as if Art making lifted me up and out of my own limited thinking and away from the ordinary happenings of a household. There is more out there than this.

I realised that Authentic has a hidden gift, that for me kept emerging through words, books, and a TV show (I rarely watch TV and it’s always through a catch-up service).

It’s said our entire self changes within seven years, I’ve been going back in my mind to that time and the strongest memory is of being at Psychology and Art retreat, talking with a new friend about life, Art, and mantras. Wondering how I, I could teach that? Both of us thinking aloud of which way to navigate our lives next. Retreats are wonderful experiences for taking yourself away from the day to day thinking and towards inner and outer views.

I feel this ‘lockdown’ way of life has been like a retreat (with a baby that sentence is a stretch), in the time I’ve had I have listened to the whispers of what’s next, I’m starting to own Art making again, playing, reading and mantras.

In the same week, as these thoughts swirled around my mind and paint smudged into my pages, I found after months of looking for it, a book on Art and Yoga by Hari Kirin Kaur Khalsa. Feeling inspired I created a Facebook group called Yoga & Art, in the group I will teach Kriyas for creativity and share Art exercises, from this book and others too.

This is a chance for people to share what they have made, painted, created in a private space. You can share for likes, comments, feedback, or simply accountability.

A lot of what I put out there I feel is seen at face value ie. white woman in a turban. That’s not what I truly want and with a group, I can question who comes into the creative space too. Unless that sentence is a woman in a turban living her truth and supporting others through art and yoga to live their most authentic lives now.

You can find my Facebook page here and join the group from there!

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Darkness, lightness we grow

June 23, 2019

This journal page started off as an open letter to life, in pen I wrote freehand all the things that were bothering me, a term that kept getting repeated was ‘Another key annoyance is..’ As I wrote freely, I started to see positives to the things that were bothering me and felt lighter.

Nothing had changed or was solved though I explored feelings and got it out on a page that I knew no one was going to read as it would also be full of hidden messages with layers of paint on top.

I had a comment on Instagram about the terms darkness and light a while back, they were saying there was no darkness because it’s all something to learn from and embrace. While I get what they’re getting at, there are days where I am in darkness. I feel unhappy, dissatisfied, not understood, striving for change that is ultimately gradual and uncertain about life.

There’s no denying it and I feel I’m getting better at sitting in the not-knowingness of life and ‘living my questions now’.

We are all familiar with contrast, we see differences in people, clothes, things, and experiences. We can learn something from it instead of jumping forward to label it, something I feel happens in bullying.

Sometimes you have to be in that darkness, sit in it till you see or feel some lightness in your being. Without the dark, we wouldn’t know light.

The word Guru translates to Gu – from darkness Ru – to light. That teacher which carries you from darkness to light. In the here and now we have people, experiences and teachings that that take us from a place of being in darkness to a lightness.

Yogi Bhajan once said if you’re having a wonderful ecstatic experience meditating, you’re not doing it right. Meditation is a cleansing process, clearing the mental garbage of the mind.

Similar in life, we aren’t all happy all the time, we can, however, pay attention, get intentional and grow from where we are.

That in itself is spirituality.

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Three things that have lit my creative fire this week

March 22, 2019

Three things that have recently refueled my creative fire this week (four if you count a shift in hormones allowing me to wake up sooner).

The first came in a casual conversation with new family member Jag, he’s an artist, you can find him here. I showed him some home extensions, one of them is my creative space. We chatted about painting and shared stories of how we’ve both created over time. I shared some personal hang-ups and he listened and brought forth so much encouragement.

The second was mulling around twitter on a search for #artjournaler and I came across an old-time blogger iHannah. She’s still around painting journal pages in Sweden and her video on a page a day reminded me to just have fun and play. ‘It doesn’t matter if you paint a bad self-portrait in your journal one day, afraid to show the world – just do it.’

The third was a dream, I had a nap and dreamt I was in a small house with husband and he came to look at what I was painting, he said it was a lot of darks and there were no lights. I looked at my small canvas – dark brown, dark orange. I looked at the room, it was almost completely dark. He suggested I use lighter colours, go light, be lighter.

These three experiences tie in well with a podcast episode I listened to recently on Achieve your goals by Hal Elrod. To use what you read (or in this case experience, learn) to positively impact your behavior. It will change your thinking, you may go back and check your values. The real change happens when you change your behavior in a positive way.

Since our conversation, I’ve found a new appreciation of my creative space, I’m still experimenting with drawing though I am letting loose paint across a page again. It is partly about letting go of the past too.

iHannah inspires me no end, since watching her video and going through her blog again I’ve started journaling in an almost finished journal and added paint in new Moleskine one too. I’ve also loosened up the ‘Draw your day’ I was doing in my square book (that only resulted in four pages a month anyway) and am doing a mix of drawing and playing

Old and new supplies organised to play with

I finally updated my main art supplies! These will be on the go style supplies, inspired by journal girls couch box revisited I did a big shop on Art discount and Cassa Art. Though less is more and keeping it simple is key, so are quality paints, pens, and brushes. It needed a mix-up.

I have been painting lighter, colour blocking is so much fun.

I’m exploring a possible journal project, looking into how I can journal pre-prepped pages while still making a mark in the moment. Who knows how I will feel weeks from now, a change and plummet of hormones made it unbearable to even look at a page before, let alone fill it with colour soulfully.

It’s as if a light has been turned on and the windows are wide open.

What has lit a spark for you this week?

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A letter of encouragement to my future self

February 4, 2019

There’s an exercise I learned called ‘A letter of encouragement’ similar to ‘Letter to my future self. I wouldn’t call it a ritual but it is an important personal piece of folded paper that has been around three house moves spanning 10 years!

Titled ‘Letter of accomplishment and proud moments’. At the top is my name and ‘Well done for achieving the following’. Underneath I wrote 13 bullet points of things I wanted to accomplish in the next 5-10 years. A list of seemingly impossible goals.

I folded it to the size of a small rectangle and titled it ‘Taran’s letter of accomplishment to self’ then folded it to a square and tucked it into a basket of toiletries in my bedroom.

I hid it mostly, only seeing it again when I fumbled around for something. It didn’t state ‘Open in 2019’ I just knew I wouldn’t open in it in a very long time. The longer time went by the more I could marvel at what I had done, I had long forgotten what was on the list anyway!

That was 10 years ago, Its time for a new note.

Out of 13 things on the list, I had accomplished four of them, highlighted in neon pink.

Two have been done and the other two are soon to happen. I wrote them when they seemed almost unreachable.

I wrote them in present tense as if I was reflective writing though I also add ‘You must be thrilled’ for example, as if being spoken by an encouraging friend.

One of them reads ‘Learning to drive – You passed! You drive with ease and confidence’. I wrote it when I had no idea if driving was even for me, I walked everywhere and was driven around by a then-boyfriend.

‘For traveling, being free to explore and discover new areas I love’, I wrote this before traveling parts of Asia and it applies to more recent trips in Europe too.

‘For giving birth and raising a child – You’re a mum before 30!’ Is in progress, at 29 I am 32 weeks pregnant and will be a mum long before my birthday.

Lastly ‘For raising a child and providing the best care and money while pursuing what matters most’ is on the right track. I am looking forward to being a full-time mom for a while. I’m also hot on mindful budgeting and learning about financial abundance for the first time in my life.

As for the other things of the list: publishing a book of poetry, holding down a great job, finishing my Arts degree and being a self-employed Art Therapist, they all fell away and weren’t really for me.

These weren’t for everyday reading like affirmations or visualisations, they change as you do.

I wrote out another list though when writing this, I rewrote the note again. I noticed a subtle difference between the two. The first was heartfelt. I remember sitting, feeling still and hopeful and writing a letter as if I was really congratulating my future self.

I looked over at my new list and I just didn’t feel that connection. I wrote it out again as if I was really letter writing, I titled my pen a bit in an effort to write slower. It holds joy, hope, faith, and a future vision now.

Under my name, I wrote out 8 accomplishments, that could be potentially ticked off in the next 5 years. There really is no limit, you could fill the entire page both times with plans!

Note opening estimate: Year 2024

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